Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Turning Indian, I Think I'm Turning Indian, I Really Think So

For those of our readers who have lived, or are currently living, overseas, I think you'll agree with me when I say that there are moments where you catch yourself doing something that is so out of character for your home country, yet so inline with what people in your adopted country would do, you can only marvel at the experience. Let me explain.

Last night, I was sitting at my computer listening to a lecture. Over the sound of my professor's voice, I heard quite a bit of shouting coming from outside. We live on a busy thoroughfare, and there's often shouting, so I ignored it for a little while. However, as the sounds persisted, my curiosity mounted and I started stalking from one balcony to the next in an attempt to discover the source of the noise. I realized, after a few minutes, that the argument was coming from within our apartment complex. I was so excited by this that I ran outside the front door and stood watching as the fight moved down the stairs and out into the parking area. I watched unabashedly, discussing the possible motive for such screaming with my neighbors. Brad eventually wandered out and he stood with me for awhile while the argument carried on. As the gentleman in the middle of the dispute turned back on the building, I gazed down at him with curiosity, damning my inability to understand Hindi or Kannada. It was like Desperate Housewives: Bangalaroo and I had a front seat for the action, which was oh-so entertaining, even if the subtitles weren't working.

Now I want to be clear about the difference between how I would listen in on a fight in the US versus this one. In the US, if one were to hear a fight going on, they would of course take notice. One may even come up with some sort of ruse to move a bit closer. However, to be caught listening in would be the height of embarrassment. Americans don't want to look as if they are poking their noses in someone else's business. In India, there is no shame. If you're going to get in an argument, you better believe that the people around you are going to listen in and perhaps even take sides. By the time this argument hit it's peak, there were at least 20 people involved. I'm certain that those people didn't start out as part of the altercation, but they decided to help out, as best they could.

One of the best things about living in a foreign culture is watching the ways in which the society permeates in your everyday life. I'll never be an Indian. But I may end up an American with a dash of spice.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Happy Thanksgiving

Gobble, gobble, gobble,

Sorry we have been so net-absent lately (OK, more than lately). We have a laundry-list of excuses, none of which shall I bore you with. Well, maybe one… Elizabeth and I are in the old USA right now. We've been here about 6 weeks. We surprised a bunch of people – the last of which was Kathrin last week in L.A. So, we couldn't exactly blog about surprising everyone until we were finished. Too bad we can't surprise Josh & Megan in Durham.

This will be a short update with hopes for a more regular series of posts in the future. So, I published my first book! It was published by Dharmaram Publications in Bangalore (associated with my school) and is entitled The Quest for Postmodern Ethics: A Phenomenological Comparison of Martin Heidegger and Sri Aurobindo Ghose. It's not on Amazon yet, but I am hopeful. I am thrilled to say that it is going to be reviewed by the Journal for Hindu-Christian Studies in their next issue! Even if they hate it, at least it will get some exposure. It is also going to be reviewed for the Journal of Dharma.

In other exciting news, last year I had an article published by the Journal of Dharma on the eco-pneumatology of Raimon Panikkar. The exciting thing is that last month I received a hand-written letter from Panikkar! How groovy is that?

Elizabeth also has big news. She has been offered an internship at a hospital in Boston! I am very proud of her – though it does add a tiny bit more pressure for me to get into Harvard's doctoral program.

Unfortunately, our journey home was not under ideal conditions. We came home several weeks earlier than planned because we wanted to spend extra time with my sister Cathy, her daughter Caylyn, her son Evan, and her husband Tully. Caylyn's leukemia relapsed following a bad bout of pneumonia (as opposed to a good case of it?) and she has only spent a handful of days out of the hospital since then. Please visit her website and leave my sister a note if you get a chance: www.caringbridge.org/visit/caylynbachman
and also her fundraising site: www.CaringForCaylyn.etsy.com.

Elizabeth and I are in Connecticut right now with her family for Thanksgiving. We are going to drop by church in New Jersey on Sunday on our way back to South Carolina to see Caylyn and family more before we head back to India on Dec 4th.

Let us know if you are out there. We are both going to try to be better about postings. We wish everyone a very Happy Thanksgiving!

Saturday, September 08, 2007

Madeleine L'Engle

Madeleine L'Engle, the author of one of the best written children's books that I have ever read, has died. A Wrinkle in Time has remained one of my favorite books, even as an adult. If you've never read it, or if it has been a long time, please go out and pick it up today. She was an inspiration to me as a child, through her characters. And she remains an inspiration today. May the world be blessed with another writer who speaks to children in the way she spoke to me.

Monday, August 27, 2007

To the Most Beautiful Woman in the World

From the luckiest man in the world…

Thank you for making everyday extraordinary.
Thank you for making me laugh everyday.
Thank you for coming to India with me and supporting me in my dreams and sharing my passions with me.
Thank you for supporting me through years of unemployment as I pursue my dreams.
Thank you for your passion and compassion for others.
Thank you for loving me no matter what.
Thank you for dreaming with me and imagining the life that we want to create.
Thank you for the hard work and efforts of our wedding and for learning our vows in Sanskrit and making our wedding so very special and unique – a day I think of often and fondly.
Thank you for giving me something to wake up for every morning and for making everyday an adventure.
Thank you for showing me that philo-sophy is not just the love of wisdom but also the wisdom of love.
Thank you for two years of sheer joy and the promise of many exciting years to come.
Thank you for keeping me in a blessed state of 'started dismay' J
You are my sacchidananda… my being, my life, and my bliss.
I love you more than words could possibly express.

यदिदं हिदयं तव तदिदं हृदयं मम ।

Happy Anniversary,
Huckleberry

Monday, August 13, 2007

Strange Reactions

This week, I received a package from home. My mother just finished reading Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides and felt that I would like it, as we have very similar tastes in literature. After a few mishaps of delivery, the book arrived on Saturday. I opened the book and began to flip through it, like we all do when standing in a bookstore. I flipped to the last page and saw a few words my mother had looked up while reading the book. After a year of not seeing my mother, the mere sight of her handwriting, for the first time in a year, brought tears to my eyes.

It's strange, the things that remind me of home. We had a party over the weekend to celebrate our niece's marriage in the US. (Go Chelsea & Shawn!!!!!) While preparing, I found myself thinking that I was preparing for a Thanksgiving feast at our house in New Jersey. I had to remind myself, actively remind myself, that I was not in the US, but instead in India. It was such a bizarre sensation. It was more than a mental game I played on myself. I physically felt that I was back home. I don't know how else to explain it except to say that it was one of the most powerful moments in my life. And all I was doing was sautéing garlic!!

With my one year anniversary of being in India looming, it's difficult to ignore all that I've missed back home. It's not just the large events that have taken place, but the minutia of life. The dinners that my brother has with my parents every Sunday. The lazy afternoons that Brad's family spends around the pool. Shakespeare in the Park with friends in NYC. All the little things.

I wonder, when we're back home, what things here I'll miss. That, for me, is one of the most exciting things about coming back home. Something that I am anticipating. What memories will be evoked back home? Will I be more forgiving of the things that drive me insane here once I have the perspective of distance? What are the things that will strike me when I'm driving on a back road somewhere?

More than anything, though, I would just love to see more of my mom's handwriting.

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Rising Out of the Dark

Well, I guess it's my turn to beg our audiences' forgiveness. I know that so many of you have been checking this on a regular basis to discover what is new in the world of Bangalore, and we have been remarkably lax in the updating process. It is extraordinary how busy we become in life, quickly neglecting that which we thought we held dear.

As Brad mentioned in his post, life is terribly busy right now, for both of us. In April, I applied for and was accepted to do a Masters of Medical Physics at GA Tech. It is a distance learning program, which will enable me to study here for the next year, before we move home. It also opens all options to us in regards to moving home, as we won't be limited to finding a place that suits both our academic interests. It takes the pressure off. My classes begin on August 20th and while I thought I was only going to take two classes a semester, it looks like I'll be taking 5 instead. Quite a load! We have on deck: Radiation Physics, Nuclear Medicine Physics, Radiation Biology & Oncology, and Special Topics in Imaging. Then, as a co-requisite, I must enroll in an anatomy & physiology class. I've already begun one, also in a distance learning format, through The College of St. Scholastica.

In addition to that, I've spent the past two months working at a local NGO, called Belaku Trust. While there are many different aspects of the work they do, I am currently involved with the income generation units. There are two units, one that does paper making, the other block printing. (If anyone is looking for custom made paper products or custom designed block printed items, you now know where to go!!) It's really inspiring work that keeps me out of the house for 12 hours a day, running around the city or to the villages of Kannakapura, 50KM south of Bangalore. The women are wonderful and have fantastic spunk. I don't know how it will work out to continue to work with Belaku while I study, but I'm hoping to do it all!

In addition to that, we're jumping with anticipation. In the next month and a half, we have two separate visits taking place. First, in the beginning of September, our good friends Josh & Megan will be arriving for a few days. If you haven't checked out their blog, you should! For the past 4 months, they have been backpacking through SE Asia and they are wrapping up their trip with a visit to us! (Okay, actually their last spot is the Maldives for scuba diving, but we're second to last! Wait, that makes us sound like chumps...) We are VERY excited to see them and have them exist in our space for a little while. A few weeks after they leave, my roommate from NYC is coming to visit! Kathrin has been diligently sending me lists of all the places she'd like to see in her 10 days here. Now, Kathrin is a bit of a picture whore (I'm sorry for the harsh language, but it's true!) so I know there will be tons of pics to upload for all to see.

As far as the year beyond that, we don't know what will happen yet! But if I am a good person, I will keep you updated.

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Finally, an update!

First, I want to apologize for not updating this blog. The good side of it is that both Elizabeth and I are very busy these days. The downside of it is… Elizabeth and I are very busy these days.

This is turning out to be one of my busiest semesters ever. I would say it is the busiest, but I think my last semester at Drew will hold that title for a while. In addition to a heavier class load than last year, I am also preparing to take the GRE (Graduate Record Exam). It sucks. It is the biggest waste of time, in both my opinion and Elizabeth's. There are so many other things I could be reading, writing and working on, but instead I am trying to memorize the definitions of countless obscure vocabulary and trying to learn how to do geometry quickly and correctly. Unfortunately, my scores on the GRE are the biggest obstacle facing me with regard to getting into PhD programs. Since I know some of you have taken the GRE, I would greatly appreciate any tips you might have – especially where to find practice tests that don't cost a fortune. (Kaplan charges $1,499 for access to their online tests – I'm neither desperate enough nor wealthy enough to pay that!)

Some exciting news… During my summer vacation, I wrote a book. It is not exactly a best-seller or an Oprah book club selection, but at least it is somewhat of an accomplishment. The title is The Quest for Postmodern Ethics: A Phenomenological Comparison of Martin Heidegger and Sri Aurobindo Ghose. I don't have a publisher yet, although Dharmaram publications (the press at my university) has indicated that they would like to publish it. I hope to shop it around to some US publishers, also. Any suggestions?

I've come to realize that the book needs a lot of work. A number of family and friends have tried to read it, but so far none of them has made it through. The first few chapters, I'm afraid, will have to be re-written. I don't know when I will find the time to do that, but I think that if I can finish it before I send out PhD applications, it may improve my chances there. I've also had two articles published – one on Raimon Panikkar and ecological implications of the Trinity. That one was published last month in the Journal of Dharma. A second one, also in the Journal of Dharma, is being reviewed by the editor and is likely to be published next month. The topic of that one is terrorism and global responsibility.

Elizabeth is doing lots of exciting things, though I will let her update you on that.

We'll both try to be better about updating the blog. If you read it, please let us know that you were here – that will encourage us to be more diligent about updating.

Namaste,

Brad

Saturday, June 23, 2007

Healing Memories

This evening, Elizabeth and I will be attending a lecture by Rev. Dr. Hans Ucko, director of the Interfaith Dialogue Division of the World Council of Churches. I was reading an interview recently given by Rev. Ucko and he was asked about the fear and mistrust among religious persons, both between different religions and between Christian denominations (and, we might add, between the scientific and religious communities). He said that we are in need of 'healing memories'.

It strikes me that this phrase has a double meaning – 'healing' can be an adjective or a verb. We need both. We need memories which are healing and we also need to heal our memories.

This year marks the 200th anniversary to the illegalization of slavery in England. At that time, slavery was a very profitable activity, so it was a bold decision to make it illegal. This, I think, is a very healing memory. As a Southerner, I have long been aware of the fact that the US has still not healed from the Civil War. Evidence of this might be found in the last Presidential election. When I meet new people here in India, I am often asked if I am from a 'blue state' or a 'red state'. Am I a 'Repulican' or a 'Democrat'? Am I a 'liberal' or a 'conservative'. These are memories in need of healing. We have made dichotomies out of things which are non-dichotomous. States are not red or blue, they are red, white, and blue. We live in a republic, so we are all republican. But we live in a republic that strives for democracy, so we are all democratic, too. 'Conservative' represents an ideal that the government should not limit the 'liberties' of persons any more than necessary. 'Liberal' means precisely the same thing – it means that 'liberty' and 'freedom' are important values and ideals. Why have we allowed the media to dichotomize these principles? Why do we continue to allow it? We need to heal these memories.

De Las Casas represents both a healing memory and a memory in need of healing. As a person of Native American descent, De las Casas represents the person who stopped the ravaging and dehumanizaition of Native American persons. This is a healing memory. Unfortunately, De las Casas also represents the beginning of the capture, enslavement, and illegal
emigration (as opposed to illegal immigration) of Africans. This is a memory in need of healing.

I invite anyone who might read this to respond with a memory of your own – either a healing memory or a memory in need of healing, or both. This can be something personal or something global or something in between. If we do not identify the memories that are in need of healing, then how can we heal them? When we do identify them, one way we can heal them is by remembering memories which are healing. We need both.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Kali

In her last post, Elizabeth mentioned our new addition to the family - a little kitten named Kali. Just after she posted that blog, however, Kali got very sick. Her first day here, just 4 weeks old, she ate all day and was happy & healthy. After that, though, she stopped eating and drinking. After 5 days, we knew that she couldn't survive much longer, so we took her back to her mother in hopes that she would eat from her. It took a few more days, but eventually she did start to eat and has made a full recovery, though she may always be rather small as a result. Now she keeps a full belly and is happier than ever and back home with us. The nursury where we got her had three other kittens returned with the same problem, and they quickly deduced what had happened. All of the kittens had eaten full meals the first day - and all of them had eaten Whiskas kitten food. They learned that when the news broke in the US that the cat food had been tainted, the cat food companies shipped all the tainted food to India. That's right, even though they KNEW the food was tainted and poisonous, they decided that it was better to ship the food to India and salvage some profits rather than throw the food out. Kali is now eating a locally made cat food and is doing great, but I am just astounded that a company could do something like that! Besides all else, it seems like a pretty stupid long-term business plan for a cat food company to knowingly poison all its customers!

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

History Unfolding

For the past few years, I have become increasingly fascinated with news on Hugo Chavez. I have always been a little bit of a history buff. I suppose I get that from my father, who is even considering retiring after an impressive career as a doctor to go back to college and study history. As a philosopher and theologian, I suppose I have been most interested in Roman history, particularly the rise of the Roman Empire and the demise of the Roman Republic. Elizabeth and I were both quite disappointed when HBO-BBC cancelled its series, 'Rome'. I suppose part of my fascination comes from John's book of Revelation, which details the Christian experience of the early Roman Empire. One of my professors at Drew, Dr. Catherine Keller, has written extensively about the rise of the US Empire over the last 50 years and a number of other professors there have written about neo-colonialism and economic hegemony.

I think all of these have fostered my utter fascination with Hugo Chavez. One big reason is that I, myself, was once an avid supporter of Chavez. Here is a man who united a nation and won re-election in a huge landslide, taking over 70% of the vote. He united the people because he fought corruption in the Venezuelan government. Prior to Chavez's reforms, most of the Venezuelan oil revenues went to make a Venezuelan aristocracy increasingly rich, while most of the country suffered impoverishment. Chavez nationalized oil and used the funds to build schools, infrastructure, and create opportunities for everyone in the country. Undoubtedly, the 30% that did not vote for his re-election were mostly the wealthy who found themselves having to work for a living. Chavez also nationalized public services, such as communications, roads, and health-care, making these services a right instead of a privilege. He has freed Venezuela from dependence on foreign subsidies and foreign aid and is helping to liberate neighboring states from these neo-colonial dependencies.

Because of his remarkable success and overwhelming popularity, the legislature decreed emergency powers to him on Jan. 31, 2007 so that he could continue to nationalize services and stamp out corruption. That was the moment when my support for him began to waver and soon thereafter, falter completely. The Venezuelan legislature basically renounced all of its power and gave it to President Chavez. He no longer needs congressional approval to negotiate trade deals, nationalize services, or even reshape the government. For all intents and purposes, the legislature brought an end to the Venezuelan republic and created a dictatorship. Unlike Julius Caesar, Chavez did not need to march across the Rubicon with the Praetorian Guard.

Yesterday, Chavez forced the closure of Venezuela's most popular TV channel, RCTV, denouncing the 53-year-old station as a "permanent attack on public morals." During his announcement of the closure, he said, "Sound the alarm in the hills, neighborhoods and towns to defend our revolution from this new fascist attack." Which attack would that be, exactly? Who, precisely, is the fascist?

A 'republic' requires checks-and-balances. The primary check comes from a balance of power shared by the legislature and executive. When the Venezuelan legislature renounced its power, they renounced that check-and-balance. A second major check is the freedom of the media. Whenever the president (any president) makes a statement, the media has the responsibility of investigating and telling us whether that statement is true, false, or (more typically) some mixture of the two. This is not the first media outlet that Chavez has closed, and if we read between the lines of his statement, it is not likely to be the last. He referred to Globovision, another Venezuelan TV station, as "enemies of the homeland," indicating his intention of closing that station, too. But what can be done? The legislature no longer has any power to stop him – they renounced that power!

We are watching history unfolding. We have seen a noble, well-intentioned (apparently, at least) liberator of the people and opponent of corruption turn a republic into a dictatorship – not by the force of arms, but by the force of popular support. But now that he has all of this power, public support is no longer necessary. There is no legal solution, even if the people of Venezuela decide that they need one. Venezuela is far from an Empire, but I think a case could be made that Chavez's efforts to 'liberate' neighboring states from US/World Bank dependence could easily turn into a dependence on Venezuela. It is not an end to neo-colonialism, it is merely a shift from one empire to another!

Over the last 30 years, and primarily during the Reagan administration, the US Congress has slowly passed more and more power to the Presidency. The leaders of both parties have consistently done this. Clinton secured fast-track trade powers and even a line-item veto (fortunately, that power expired). GW Bush has invented an entirely new Presidential power with his so-called 'signing statements', not to mention the Congressionally approved Patriot Act. The tenth amendment (states' rights) has slowly been sapped of all of its power, mostly through the use of Eisenhower's Highway funds act. Article One, Section Eight of the Constitution says "Congress shall have the power to... declare War," but Congress has not actually declared war since June 5, 1942. This Constitutional provision has basically lost all of its power as a check-and-balance of Presidential power. Why is it that Congress is not pursuing its investigation of the federal prosecutor appointments in anything other than a political/superficial way? Isn't it because the Democrats fully intend to repeat the practice when they enter the executive?

Where is all of this leading? What are the logical conclusions that must come from this? Perhaps most importantly, what, if anything, can be done about it? Do most US Americans (or most Venezuelan Americans, for that matter) actually understand the difference between a "Republic", a "Democracy", and an "Empire"? Can we see any parallel at all between Blackwater USA, and the Praetorian Guard? If the degradation of congressional and judicial powers continues, would there even be a need to "cross the Potomac"? Can we see any parallel between Julius Ceasar's cry to 'free the slaves' and the current push for immigration reform? If there is no appreciable difference between the two parties, then does the alternation of the executive make any difference at all? In his state-of-the-union speech, Bush declared the state of our union to be stronger than ever. That may be, but what of the state of our freedom and liberty? What of the state of our republic?

Sorry, I know I said my next post would be more casual. I guess I've been working too hard lately. J

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

We'd like to introduce you

Well, most of my posts have a tendency towards the serious, with many an attempt at profundity. Not today kids! Brad and I, in our desperate need to adopt all of the animals of the world, have gotten ourselves a kitten. We've named her Kali. She's three and half weeks old and is already a bundle of fun. Her new favorite place to sleep is behind the books on my desk shelf.

And yes, we're bringing her home with us next year. Morgan and Stanley will be miffed that they once again have to share us with someone who is younger and livelier.


Kali in her bed, playing with Brad. She's smaller than his hand!

She likes to sit and play in her litter box. It's a little gross, actually.

This is our girl Morgan. She's living with Brad's sister and
is waiting anxiously for us to return to her, I'm sure!!!

This is Stanley. She's chunky and is much better fed by Brad's
mother than she ever was by the two of us.
I'm sure that she'll be sad to leave the
"House of Perpetual Food and Constant Attention"!

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Can consumerism be a good thing??

Yesterday afternoon, I ran errands in town. Both of our watches needed mending, Brad was running out of notebooks and I needed a day planner. This took me, among other places, to Garuda Mall, one of the largest shopping centers here in Bangalore. Across from the mall is another smaller shopping center and when I pulled up on my scooter to the mall, I noticed a new shop had opened. MAC.

For those of you who don’t know, MAC is a cosmetics company. They have fantastic products and were a staple of my New York existence. Those of you who know me know that I am not big on wearing make up, however when I buy it, I tend to opt for MAC. They have more colors than we could have ever imagined on our own and the make up tends to wear really well.

Just the sheer familiarity of it drew me into the store. I walked around, bopping to the music playing on my iPod and touching EVERYTHING. It was great. The colors were a veritable rainbow splashed across a shimmering palette. The cosmetic brushes were standing proudly, waiting for an artist to come along and paint a beauty never before seen. My smile was tracing from one ear to the other and I felt comforted just being there.

A similar experience happened when I went to Bangkok in March to take my GRE. I had a lot of time to kill while I was there and spent most of it meandering through Bangkok’s shopping district. If New Jersey is the land of strip malls, Bangkok is the land of megamalls. It was one Mall of America after another, stretching on for blocks and blocks. I wandered through the shops, dropping in on the stores that I always loved window-shopping in: Coach, Gucci, Prada. You name it, they had it.

As I wandered through the malls in Bangkok, I stumbled upon the store I miss the most. I wandered in and breathed in the joy that it gave to me. Up and down the aisles, my hands strayed to touch things that I could never find here in India. Up one row, down the next, I finally found myself frozen and unable to move any further without making a selection of the most important items they had to offer. In front of me, a wall of spices teased me into the remembrance of home. Ground nutmeg, tri-colored peppercorns, white pepper, lemon and garlic seasoning, it went on and on. While India is one of the spice capitals of the world, there is a dearth of options at the store outside of those that the average Indian uses in their daily cuisine.

Before finding myself in the nicest grocery store I’d been in for the past 9 months, I felt like a horrible individual. Walking through the stores, I found myself craving my life in New York and the job I once had there that made shopping in some of those stores a possibility. My hands reached out and touched clothes, shoes, books…you name it, I fondled it. But the grocery store made me realize that what I miss is the familiarity of shopping. I spent 27 years with one type of shopping system. One set of rules governing the products that I saw. When I came here, the rules changed and therefore so did the shopping. There is no shame is wanting, craving, the familiar. The brick of Parmesan cheese that was a staple in our house back home. The bricks of chocolate that made baking easier. An oven to bake it. Row upon row of tank tops in every style imaginable in a society where I feel comfortable bearing my shoulders. I miss these things and I look forward to seeing them again. But now, in Bangalore, there is the power of New York in a MAC store where I can always go to remind myself a little bit of home.

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

The Scandal of the World Bank - Updated

This blog may not be about what you think it is, if you have been following the news.

Many 'citizens' of the US are not very aware of the World Bank and International Monetary Fund. The average person in the US, in my experience, does not know much about these organizations at all. To most people in the US, the letters 'IMF' refer to a series of movies starring Tom Cruise and the 'WB' is where to tune in for replays of 'Saved by the Bell'. This is, I think, because most people in the US are not directly affected (or so they think) by the WB and IMF. I wouldn't be surprised if most people in the US asked "what is the World Bank?" when the news began to break that Paul Wolfowitz had promoted his girlfriend and gave her a nice fat salary. Even more scandalous than Wolfowitz's behavior is the fact that most people (in the US) did not even know, before the scandal, that Wolfowitz was the chief of the WB, and even fewer questioned his credentials in that post or his agenda there.

To many people outside of the US, and especially in places like Africa and India, the WB and IMF are quite prominent aspects of their lives. Hugo Chavez, in fact, has taken it as his mission to 'liberate' Latin American countries from the grips of these groups. (My feelings on Chavez are ambivalent, at best, but shouldn't we at least ask why it is that this is so important to him and his constituents?) My intention here is not to educate whomever might come to read this blog on the activities of these organizations – rather, only bring them to light and encourage some level of interest in what they do and don't do. I also don't want to paint a monolithic picture of these groups as inherently evil or without good intentions, as Chavez has done – and especially not to portray them as without great possibility to change the world. Actually, I truly believe (some would say I am foolishly optimistic), that if more US Americans took an interest in these organizations, there might be hope to reduce the rampant corruption, manipulation, strong-arming, and cultural imperialism so prevalent in these groups today – and perhaps even improve the lives of the world's most desperately poor. US corporations and special interest groups give millions of dollars to US political campaigns (of both parties!), and one of their primary concerns is the selection of bureaucrats to head the WB, IMF, and participate in the WTO and UN. The fact that most people in the US couldn't care less about whom is selected is one of the greatest joys of these political contributors. It means that someone like Paul Wolfowitz can get appointed, and really no one in the US cares or is even aware of it.

Those who know me, know that I am a true believer in free-market exchange and free-development. These organizations pose as protectors and securers of free-markets, but what they say and what they do couldn't be further divided. They epitomize neo-colonialism and cultural imperialism. I would be very interested to hear/read someone who tries to make a case otherwise.

I am also a true believer in free-speech. I believe that corruption cannot withstand the bright and shining light of public awareness and scrutiny. This is precisely my point with this blog – to simply generate a little bit of concern over these organizations and encourage people to care about them a little bit. The true scandal of the World Bank is not Wolfowitz' form of nepotism, and not even the corruption so pervasive in its form of neo-colonialism… the true scandal of the World Bank is that most people in the world's wealthiest and most powerful nation neither know nor care.

I promise my next blog will be a little more light-hearted!

Addendum:

When I asked her what she thought of this blog entry, Elizabeth was kind enough to be honest and let me know what she thought was missing… namely, a point. I think she is right, so I want to elaborate a little and hopefully spark some discussion from those who agree or disagree.

Basically, my point is that people in the US don’t know or care much about the World Bank. But why should we care?

Well, the aims of the World Bank are to alleviate extreme poverty in the world and to provide much needed capital to developing markets. These are both wonderful aims. However, much of the funding is given to governments of developing nations in the form of loans and grants. Obviously, the people who decide whom receives this money are in a position of great power to set the terms necessary to receive the money. This is precisely the reason that we should care who runs the group and how they run it – that is, assuming that we care about alleviating extreme poverty and developing poor economies. The World Bank, for example, has given considerable funding to the government of the Sudan, but much of this money has been used by the government to fund genocidal efforts in Darfur. Of course, the decision by the WB/IMF to fund these terrorists (can there be another name?), has nothing to do with the massive oil reserves in Southern Sudan. Sudan sells its oil to China. It’s not as if the US & European ministers who run these self-less organization think that they can convince the new regime to sell oil to them just by bribing them with a few billion dollars – that would be immoral. Why is it, then, that they continue to fund them?

On smaller scales, loans have been given to create clean water resources in small villages throughout Africa. This is a good thing, but more often than not, these resources have been set up as private enterprises which charge local residents to use the water – not exactly a means to alleviate poverty! When I visited Ghana, I visited a few farms where the World Bank and IMF have provided low-interest or interest-free loans to farmers to buy fertilizers and pesticides. Environmental concerns aside, most of these loans were given with stipulations regarding the crops to be grown – usually coffee, cocoa, cotton, etc. In order to receive the funding, many farmers stopped growing essential crops for the residents of Ghana and started growing cocoa and other crops for export to the US. The farmers benefited (at least in the short-run, until the over-supply of these goods caused market prices to plummet), and the US markets benefitted in the form of cheaper chocolate & coffee, but the residents of Ghana and other West African countries have suffered as a result of higher food costs and not enough food to go around. Even many of the farmers starve to death – finding cotton somewhat unpalatable. As a further result, exports of US crops (especially corn & wheat, both of which are heavily subsidized by the US government) have increased to Ghana and other countries.

Now, as a firm believer in Smithian economics and free-trade, I ask – how are such manipulations ‘free’ or ‘fair’? Many defenders of the WB & IMF say that the US and other member countries have every right to place stipulations on the financing that the offer. Well, of course they do! But they can’t, then, say that they are promoting free-trade! It has to be one or the other. They say one thing, and then do the opposite. But why not? Who is calling them to task? You? Me?

As for Wolfowitz – how does the former Deputy Secretary of US Defense get appointed as President of the World Bank? Are there really that few economists that we can’t spare a single one to alleviate poverty and promote free & fair trade on the global stage?

OK, my rant is over. Although somewhat more ‘pointed’, I hope the ‘point’ is also more clear.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Holi



Last month, India celebrated the festival "Holi". This is primarily a Northern Indian festival, but it has become a national holiday over the last 10-20 years. "Holi" is basically a Springtime festival, celebrating the return of colors and warmth and fun. The first night, there are different rituals and singing and eating and dancing - At our apartment complex they were all very nicely dressed and rather formal. The children sang songs for the adults and there was a formal catered meal and socializing in the party hall. The next day, however, is completely different. Most people wear all-white clothes and some people where the same clothes that they wore the previous year for Holi. Many people (kids and adults of all ages) carry around colors... colors means powdered dye - just powdered colors - and they throw colors on one another. At our complex, there was a big color party out in the courtyard and people even brought super-soaker water guns filled with colored water. Other people had buckets or just piles of dry color. Unfortunately, I missed the excitement because I had a Sanskrit lesson, but driving accross town I saw people all over the city dousing one another on the streets with color, having a great time. I saw men and women riding motorcycles down the street - as if everything were normal, but they were completely covered from head to toe with every possible color! When I got home, Elizabeth met me at the door with a big smile on her face - and big red marks on her cheeks and forehead. She explained that our chief of security, Sanjay, had knocked at the door and she opened it to find him covered all over with colors and a huge ear-to-ear grin - and one hand behind his back! She said that he asked about me, hoping to get us both. When he found out I wasn't home, he got Elizabeth with some red colored dye on her cheeks and forehead and warned that he'd be back when I got home. We vowed that next year we would be involved in all the functions - the party the night before and the festival of color, too. This year, though, Elizabeth got some great snapshots of Holi from the balcony of our apartment - and one of herself, too :) (click the photos to see them more clearly - especially the one right below)


Monday, April 23, 2007

Homesickness

As long as I’ve been able to think, I’ve been one to dream. I’m sure my parents could regale you with stories of the games I’d make up and the tales that would come dancing out of my head. I think that’s part of the reason I was so attracted to acting; it was a way to live other lives without having to give up my own. Alternative universes hold a taunting attraction to me.

With that in mind, it should come as no surprise to anyone that I had a litany of daydreams before moving to India. It had been a longstanding dream of mine to live in a foreign country, with all it entails. I can’t pinpoint a specific fantasy that I had, but they were sweeping and grand, filled with tame adventure and lush romance. Not of the sexual kind, but emotional romance. I was going to fall in love with this new home of mine and it was going to fall in love with me.

Seven months in and I can say that the daydreams are far from the reality we’re facing. Life here is a constant struggle for both of us. A struggle to be understood, to shed our American-born instincts and prejudices. We spend a great deal of our time venting to each other about petty things that happened. A woman in line pushed me to do her best to shove me out of her way. A man in an auto almost ran me off the road because he didn’t want to wait for me to pass. We have yet to make any friends of any kind. We’re too new, too different. Instead of wanting to be our friends, people would rather study us and watch us, like animals in a zoo. So my best friend has been promoted to sole friend, for all intents and purposes. Not that I’ve forgotten about everyone back home. In fact, I probably spend more time thinking about everyone than I ever did when we lived closer to each other. But with 14 months looming in the future, you all seem so damned far away as to be surreal. I’m not quite convinced that the world we left still exists.

This past week, we both went through a real bout of homesickness, which inevitably led to discussions about the possibility of visiting. Our friend Ali, who visited for two weeks and left last Saturday, brought me crashing back to reality when she told me that her visit home had increased her homesickness when she got back to Japan. That tidbit, mixed with a bank account that is perpetually decreasing, convinced us that we should only go home if it were a complete crisis of homesickness (barring true family emergencies, of course) and only after we’ve passed our halfway point in this journey. Because going home now means returning to fourteen more months and the knowledge that I only made it through the first seven before I had to run back home.

I don’t mean to be a big downer and I don’t want anyone to think that we regret our decision to move here. I think we’re both more and more certain that we’ve done the right thing. We like challenging and pushing ourselves into uncomfortable situations. But with all of this in mind, we have a request. We know that the people who read this blog think of us and not just when you read the blog. We know that there are scores (okay, maybe just dozens) of people who truly care for us. So this is the favor we ask of you. When you think of us, either of us, just let us know. It doesn’t need to be a dramatic, pages long e-mail. Just one line to say that we’re still there even while we’re here. And when you read the blog, let us know that you did. Even if we don’t know you. (Yes, that means you, whomever you are in Australia reading this. We want to know you too!!!!) It helps us feel just a little more connected and therefore a little less lonely.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

My Indian Interview

I was asked by my academic adviser at Drew to write an article for our semesterly newsletter, The Dilated Times. I thought it would be fun to share. Enjoy!

I had been told there would only be three or four professors in the room with me. I was therefore surprised to walk into a room with nine people in it. I had thought that my admissions interview would be a casual affair, but the two girls who had been waiting outside of the room with me worked me into a bit of a tizzy before I was called in.

When the PI in my lab at NCBS offered me a chance to get a masters in research, I accepted with eagerness. My husband and I moved here to India for his education, but if I could walk away with a degree as well, it would be two years well spent.

NCBS, or the National Centre for Biological Sciences, is a research institution in Bangalore, India that operates under the auspices of the Tata Foundation and in affiliation with the Indian Institute of Sciences. I started in a lab there through my REU connections at Princeton. Mukund, the PI, was a great help, opening his lab to me and doing his best to help me feel at home here in Bangalore. After a few months of driving to work everyday, Mukund approached me with an idea that he’d come up with to make my time in India more productive. NCBS has a masters option for people that they deem to be very worthy of a place there. The admissions committee didn’t want my transcript, only two or three references. The hurdle I had to overcome was the interview.

Now, in the US, an interview is not so much about demonstrating one’s ability as allowing both sides to get to know each other a little bit. Goals are discussed. Perhaps a gap in one’s education or experience is brought up, but the main focus is on personality. So I was a bit surprised when I was asked to walk to the board a few minutes into the interview. It turns out that, in India, an interview is closer to an oral exam.

To the credit of the guys in my lab, they did their best to prepare me. They let me know their experiences: Sugat had been terribly nervous, Vivek had tried once already to get into the Ph.D. program but hadn’t gotten past the interview. There was one guy who had been grilled for two hours on the finer points of physics. Mukund told me not to worry about it, that I would just be asked basic questions.

So I stood at the board in front of nine Indian professors, a little concerned about the language barrier and clutching at the dry erase marker that I’d been given. I wanted to be impressive for so many reasons. I felt I was representing Mukund and the US and women and Drew University and Dr. F. and on and on. They asked me what my focus was within physics. I went with optics as I’d not only taken a class in it but had also worked in Dr. McGee’s lab for a year and a half. The questions came at me and I choked. There’s no way around it. I choked. It was dreadful. It was like the dream where you show up to class naked. They took their time and were patient with me, but my fears and lack of preparation shined through.

When I thought it couldn’t possibly go on any longer, they began with questions about biology. How do you measure the volume of a cell with a microscope? I’d been warned about questions like this. How do you find the percentage of a body’s mass that is taken up by the blood? Experimental questions that, had I taken extensive biology classes, I still may not know. By this point, I was so defeated that I didn’t even attempt to come up with an answer.

Certainly, now, now it must be over. But there was one set of questions left to be answered. Ten quick queries to test…well, I’m not certain what it was meant to test. Plot x^2 + y^2 = 4. What is 38 written in Base 17? I did my best to make it through and then stumbled out the door.

Putting aside my frightful display, it’s interesting to note the difference between a higher institution in the US and its equal in India. While Ph.D. programs in the US are competitive it is nothing compared to the system here in India. With 1.1 billion people living here, according to the CIA factbook, and only a handful of government-approved institutions for higher learning, there is a logjam when it comes to applications. Schools have to be demanding of their applicants.

In order to get into any major engineering or science institution, the student must apply to take an entrance exam that is administered by the institution itself. This severely limits the number of schools that a person can apply to, as each has their own exam. And the exams are known to be tremendously difficult. One recent exam at one of the most competitive schools had the following question: A bear is sitting on a shelf and falls 10m. If it takes 1 sec to fall, what is the color of the bear?*

The top scores, perhaps 30 percent, are then invited to submit another application that includes an essay. From this batch, 5-10% are brought in for interviews. With as many as 3,000 people applying for 10-12 spots, the competition is fierce and the universities have come up with the best methods they can in order to narrow the field down. I couldn’t help but ask myself: if we used the same system in the US, would I even have a physics degree?
To be fair, there is a lot of talk within the Indian academic community about the need for more schools. And there was recently an article in the New York Times discussing how American universities are extending their institutions to the Indian subcontinent, through both the internet and affiliations, in order to offer alternatives to a system that is lacking. They need more schools here. But I couldn’t help wondering.

Unfortunately, things did not work out for me at NCBS. Between visa problems and my debacle of an interview I was not able to enroll. I was invited by one of the professors to try again in six months, but by that time it will be too late to complete the program in time for our departure from India. I have instead applied to Georgia Tech to complete a masters of science in medical physics, which they administer as a distance learning course. My departure from NCBS is equal parts embarrassment from my poor performance and a desire to study something that will directly contribute to my future goals. Fortunately, Georgia Tech won’t ask me to fly to Atlanta for an interview with nine of their most challenging professors!

*The answer is white. I made up these numbers for demonstration. You’re meant to solve for acceleration, make note that it is larger than the accepted value, realize that the accepted value is taken closer to the equator, reason that farther away from the equator one travels the stronger gravity is and deduce that only polar bears live at the poles. Congratulations to those who got it.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

The Peace Trust and UCC

Just a few hours before Palm Sunday began, Elizabeth, myself, and our friend Alison (Ali), arrived in Kanyakumari, which is the southern-most tip of India. It is a beautiful place where three seas converge – the Bay of Bengal to the East, the Arabian Sea to the West, and the Indian Ocean to the South. Because of our relationship with Rev. Wesley Ariarajah at Drew Theological School in New Jersey, we were invited to stay at an institution called The Peace Trust. On the Monday following Palm Sunday, we were privileged to meet with the founder and director of the Peace Trust, Rev. Dr. Gnana Robinson, who was a one-time classmate of Rev. Ariarajah's in Bangalore.

Just prior to our meeting with him, we sat in on an orientation meeting that he was directing. This was an orientation of about 200 students (all young women) who were beginning a program at the Peace Trust. This vocational training curriculum for women is a part of the Tsunami Relief and Rehabilitation program organized by the Peace Trust. In the small town of Kanyakumari, 772 men, women, and children lost their lives in the Tsunami of 2004, not to mention all of the families who lost all their possessions. This program at the Peace Trust provides free food, housing, and vocational training in culturally specific trades, such as candle making, arts and crafts, or other pragmatic trades that provide means for women to financially support themselves and their families while also meeting the needs of their communities.

We were very proud to learn that this Tsunami Relief vocational program for women is almost entirely funded by Global Ministries, a mission of the United Church of Christ and the Disciples of Christ. The UCC/DC committed to support the program for three years, beginning just after the Tsunami in December 2004. The program has been a tremendous success and I would encourage the UCC to continue their financial support beyond the three-year commitment, perhaps committing to an additional three years.

The Tsunami Relief vocational program is only one of many programs at the Peace Trust. Their primary goal is inter-religious dialogue and peacemaking (Mathew 5:9). I asked Rev. Dr. Robinson what we could do to support the Peace Trust. He handed us a form that contains a ten-fold covenant. I am going to type the covenant below and I encourage you all to read it. You can easily make this covenant on your own in your daily life. Each aspect of the covenant is based in scriptural passages which I will place in parentheses. If you see fit to make a contribution, either as an individual or as an institution, please contact me or send your contribution as a money order to:

The Convener, The Prophetic Forum for the Life and Witness of the Churches in India (PFLWCI)

Peace Trust Kanyakumari
Anjukootuvilai Road
Kanyakumari, TamilNadu 629-702
India

If you wish, you may include this signed covenant and mention that you learned of the Peace Trust through us, but that is not necessary. This is a wonderful, wonderful mission that is truly enacting this mission of the Kingdom of God and it would be an excellent organization for you or your church family to support as you see fit.

  1. I will prayerfully try to discern the Will of God in every given situation and obey the Will of God, whatever the cost may be (Luke 22:42; John 4:34, 5:30, 6:38ff, 7:17, 9:31; Matthew 7:21, 12:50; Mark 3:35)
  2. I know the Will of God is always to do Good and to save life (Deu 30:15; Jer 21:8; Mark 3:1-4, 2:27)
  3. I acknowledge that the purpose of God becoming human in Jesus is to give holistic life to all humans irrespective of caste, race, creed, color, and gender. This, I believe, is the Good News (Gospel) to the poor. I commit myself to proclaim and practice this Gospel. (Luke 4:18-19; John 3:16, 17:2)
  4. The Church, as such, is a "Called Out Community" sent back into the world with a mission to give fullness of life to all people. I, therefore, acknowledge that the mission of the Church is primarily to those to whom "fullness of life" is denied – the poor, the marginalized, the exploited, the down-trodden, the refugees, the Dalits and the oppressed. I, therefore commit myself. (1 Peter 2:9; John 17:18)
  5. Not to indulge in any activity that will bring harm to others, even to those who do harm to me, and to abstain from personalized politics (Hosea 11:9; Matthew 18:22; luke 15:11-24, 22:34; Colossians 3:12-13)
  6. Not to compromise with any evil, even if it should mean cross for me (Matthew 4:1-11, Mark 10:43-45; Romans 12:2)
  7. Not to succumb to the temptations of personal gains, however attractive they may be (Luke 14:33; Mark 8:34)
  8. Not to remain silent in the face of gross injustice happening before me, but to break my silence and to protest against injustice that threatens the lives of the people (2 Samuel 12:7-9; 1 Kings 21:20; Amos 3:8; Jer 20:9; Mark 11:17; and many, many others)
  9. To be in solidarity with all the victims of injustice and to join in their struggle for liberation and in their search for wholesome human life (Mark 2:15-16, 17; Matthew 9:10-11; Luke 5:29-30)
  10. To be faithful to the One who called me until the end of my life. (2 Timothy 4:7; 1 Cor 1:9, 10:12; James 1-2)

Friday, April 06, 2007

Pragmatic Philosophy for Easter

Anyone who has made any effort to read and digest philosophy, whether it is the Holy Scriptures, Theology, or any other kind of philosophical thought will agree that philosophy is usually challenging. I have also heard many people (friends, family, fellow students, strangers) argue that philosophy is impractical. They often argue that philosophy and theology are simply academic exercises where scholars gather and argue of things that have no bearing upon daily life. Some even argue that philosophers and theologians should devote their lives to something of greater substance that affects the daily lives of people in need. I want to try, as best as I can in a brief blog entry, to respond to claims such as these.

Science, as it is generally understood, is usually concerned with the questions “how?” or “what?” For example, “What is cancer?” or “How does cancer reproduce?” Both of these questions are steps taken to eventually answer the question, “How can we cure cancer or alleviate the suffering that it causes?” When scientists ask questions such as these, no one inquires as to whether or not these questions are pragmatic because the practical application of these questions are very obvious and there is clearly a great need to answer these questions. Since I lost both grandmothers to cancer and since my niece has been diagnosed with leukemia, the pragmatism of these endeavors is all the more evident.

Philosophy (which includes theology), is nearly always concerned with the questions “Why?” or “what is the meaning of ___?” For example, a theologian may ask, “If God is wholly Good, all powerful, and all knowing, then why does cancer exist? Why do bad things happen to good people? If God is omni-present, then where does evil exist and why?” To some, the answer seems clear. They would say that God gave humans free will and because humans are not perfect, they sometimes choose sin over righteousness. This, however, doesn’t seem to explain cancer. Also, it would lead us to ask, “if heaven exists and if humans have free will in heaven, then is there sin and suffering in heaven? If we say that humans in heaven have free will, but always choose righteousness and never choose sin, then we are back to our first question again – why didn’t God create heaven in the first place – where humans have free will but always choose righteousness?”

Critics might dismiss these questions and say that there is no answer – or at least that we are incapable of understanding the answers. I agree with that. However, just because they are unanswerable does not mean that there are not very practical, pragmatic reasons to try, as best as we are able, to understand these questions better.

The reason, as I see it, is that because we have free will, we have a responsibility to try and choose what is right, as best as we can. We usually make decisions based on what we believe to be true. But belief is all about “why?”. For example, a scientist tries to cure cancer because he/she believes that all humans should have the very best chance to experience the fullness of life with as little suffering as possible. People in our society find it shocking and even upsetting if someone ever asks the question “Why should we cure cancer?”

Many questions are exactly the same as this question, but many people seem to ignore the questions altogether. For example, “why do we live in a world where food is abundant, but 44,000 people every single day die of starvation?” “Why is it that we value the human life of those in our own country more than the lives of humans in other parts of the world?” “Why do many Christians celebrate the sacrifice of Jesus but seem reluctant to honor that sacrifice by sacrificing for the sake of others?”

We don’t ask the question “why should we cure cancer” because we already know the answer – the answer is because all people deserve fullness of life that is as free as possible from suffering. Because we know the answer, we jump straight to science and ask scientists to tell us “what is cancer?” and “How can we cure it?” Philosophers and Theologians want us to approach other questions in a similar fashion. For example, once we answer the question, “why do we live in a world where food is abundant, but 44,000 people every single day die of starvation?” then we SHOULD ask “what is wrong with our system of civilization?” and then ask “How do we find a cure for those problems?”

Allow me to elaborate with a brief example from our history.

There was a time, over four centuries ago, when the question was asked, “Are Native Americans human?” There were philosophers and theologians that argued on both sides of the question. For people of that time, the answer was not self-evident as it may be to us today. There was a legal council where both sides were argued and the King of Spain considered both sides of the question. A man named De las Casas argued that Native Americans were humans and must be treated as humans with the same basic human rights as Spaniards and other Europeans. The king sided with de las Casas and the enslavement of Native Americans came to an end. However, the very same man, de las Casas, and the very same King of Spain decided that Native Africans were not human. That marked the beginning of African slavery in North and South America. The Constitution of the United States declared that slaves were 3/5 human and 2/5 non-human. A philosopher by the name of Benjamin Franklin objected. He voted against the Constitution and refused to be considered as a candidate for President. He spent the rest of his life fighting for the abolition of slavery on the grounds that Africans were human and deserved the same basic human rights as non-African humans.

I hope that this history is not unfamiliar to people, particularly North and South Americans. However, I mention it here because I think it is an important demonstration of the practical use of philosophy. Philosophy and Theology are primarily concerned with questions like “What is a human person?” or “Why is one living thing called ‘human’ and another thing ‘non-human’?” Also, “Why do we hold some people to be more valuable than others? Should this be so? Why don’t we change this?”

Elizabeth, Ali, and I had a powerful and upsetting experience yesterday. We arrived in Pondicherry at the Sri Aurobindo Ashram. I will leave her to blog about that experience, but my blog is, in large part, a reaction to those experiences. Basically, Aurobindo was an Oxford-educated philosopher of the 20th Century who argued that each and every individual person is as valuable as any group of persons. To him, institutions, governments, and even religious groups often overlook that each person is unique and that diversity is every bit a part of our unity as our similarities. While we should always strive to work together to make the world a better place, where all people can experience the fullness of life free from as much suffering as possible, we must never forsake the fact that we have been Created by God as individual persons who are unique and valuable. For Aurobindo, it is not because we are the same that we should listen to one another and work together, it is because we are unique and special. There is a Western Philosopher, Wittgenstein, that made a similar statement. He said, “I am not less important than you. I am not more important than you. I am not equally as important as you. I am a unique and special person, and so are you.” Sri Aurobindo said that “our Unity is fulfilled in our diversity.”

Please forgive me for the length of this blog. I have tried to make my argument as brief as possible. As a philosopher and as a theologian, though, I deeply believe that philosophy and theology are very pragmatic/practical endeavors. In my humble opinion, we simply must ask “why do I value this person this way and that person another way? Why do I live my life the way that I do? Why does this person live her/his life the way that they do?” Ultimately, all of these questions are part and parcel of the ultimate philosophical/theological question: “Why am I here? What am I called to do? How should I live my life today, tomorrow, and everyday?” These are unanswerable questions, but this does not mean that we should not live every single day with these questions in mind. If our lives and our choices – our exercise of free-will – are not guided by our best attempts to answer these questions, then what is our life guided by? My philosophy and my theology leads me to the belief that everyday I must humbly bow before God and pray that I might discern my purpose. Every single day, I believe that God answers these questions. Many days, I am too wrapped up in the trivial comings-and-goings of life to recognize God’s answer – but even on those days, I believe that God has provided the answers. The reason I believe this because on those other days – the days that I am open and receptive to God’s discerning call, I am able to receive those answers. It is my belief that God provides these answers every day, regardless of whether or not we ask those questions. But when we prayerfully ask, we are more open and receptive to receive the answers.
Returning to my opening statement, philosophy and theology are challenging. Sometimes, they are challenging because we do not understand the questions. Other times, though, they are challenging because we do know the answers. In light of Easter Sunday, I invite you all to read Mark’s account of the empty tomb in Mark 16:1-8. We are told that Mary, Mary, and Salome “went out and fled from the tomb, for terror and amazement had seized them; and they said nothing to anyone, for they were afraid.” As theologians, we all must ask, why were they afraid? Were they afraid because they did not understand? OR, were they afraid because they did understand? They had been told to go to Galilee. (Mark 16:7) Perhaps they were afraid because they knew that it was their turn (and our turn) to follow in the footsteps of Jesus and sacrifice for the sake of those who could not experience the fullness of life free from as much suffering as possible. Perhaps they remembered what Jesus said in Mark 8:34 “If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.”

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Tomorrow

Would that it were tomorrow, so that my friend would have arrived
Would that it were the fall, with my education solidified
Would that it were two years from now, so we’d know where we’ll live
Would that it were a decade hence, so I’d see all I’ll have to give
Would that I were a mother, so my children I would know
Would that I were a proper adult, with my own chateau
Would that I were 90, looking back on my life
Enjoying all the times I’ll live filled with joy and strife

Yet if it were tomorrow, I’d have missed tonight
And if it were the fall, I’d have seen no summer nights
If it were two years from now, India would no more be
And if it were a decade hence, there’d be less to see
If I were already mom, the anticipation would be gone
And if was all grown up, my life would be foregone
And if on death’s door I stood, waiting for the end
There’d be nothing else to look forward to, no more laughter or friends

Then I’ll dream about tomorrow, and fill it up with sun
I’ll dream about the time this fall and how the days will run
I’ll picture life two years from now, all the options in a range
I’ll fear about a decade hence and how much will have changed
I’ll wonder about motherhood and the family I will gain
I’ll postpone adulthood the best I can, and childlike will remain
And when death finally comes to knock upon my door
I’ll turn myself full on to him and soulfully implore

I wish it that it were yesterday, without responsibility or care!
I wish that I had one more fall, with crimson leaves in my hair!
I long for the time when my husband was studious and free
I beg that I can once again live out my destiny!
My children ask that you grant their mother one more chance
While my husband’s plea is that we have one final dance
Death! please let me press you for one more thing
Take me back to the beginning and let me do it again

Hope and Courage for Dialogue

Even before I joined the United Church of Christ a few years ago, I admired Rev. Dr. Bernice Powell Jackson. When I heard her speech (or, better said, sermon) at the World Council of Churches Assembly last year, I was simply overwhelmed and immediately proud to be associated with both the World Council, of which she is a President, and the UCC, in which she is ordained.

This morning, as I read my daily scriptural passage emailed to me by Sojourner’s, I caught her name on a link. She gave a sermon a few nights ago on Romans 5. Whatever your political or religious leanings, I think you will find this sermon enlightening: http://www.beliefnet.com/blogs/godspolitics/2007/03/bernice-powell-jackson-hope-does-not.html

One issue which continues to trouble me is a pervasive lack of commitment among religious persons, politicians, and global leaders to simply sit down and dialogue. Rev. Jackson’s sermon is about hope, particularly hope in the face of suffering and struggle. I don’t believe that violence can lead to peace. I don’t believe that freedom and democracy can ensue from military force. I know that many people disagree with, and that is OK. Actually, that is what freedom and democracy is about, isn’t it?

But what I do not understand is a lack of commitment to dialogue. If we are truly committed to our own beliefs… if we truly believe in them and honestly feel that those are the right, ethical, moral, and just positions to hold, then doesn’t it also stand to reason that those positions that we hold so dear would always reveal themselves as truth in an open and honest dialogue?
Toward the end of her sermon, Rev. Jackson said, “Hope, for Christians, can never just be a word – it must become an action… a public commitment to follow Jesus in the non-violent struggle for justice and peace.” For me, this action and public commitment must begin (without end) with open dialogue and discussion. This requires courage, indeed, to subject our ideas and beliefs to criticism and argument, but this courage finds its endless source rooted in hope. In the words of St. Paul:

“We also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.” (Romans 5:3-5, NRSV)

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Fifteen Generations

Yesterday was a holiday here in the state of Karnataka. Most of the holidays here are based on the lunar cycle, like Easter and Passover, so yesterday was a new moon, the beginning of the new year, and there also happened to be a solar eclipse yesterday morning - an auspicious day indeed!

Among the traditions which mark the beginning of the new year, there is a tradition to clean everything - sort of like "Spring Cleaning" in the US. Also, some sweet food is prepared. Shyla made us rice keer (rice pudding). Shymala, the wife of my Sanskrit guru, Suresh, prepared sweet pongal, which is a little similar to rice pudding. I went for a sanskrit lesson yesterday and I asked him about the holiday as we ate lunch. He told me that I should eat the sweet pongal first as a symbol of hope that the new year would be sweet and a reminder that we should first be sweet to others.

Then he said that they would be celebrating the new year again in two weeks. He said that Tamil Nadu (the state just east & south of us) begins their new year on the full moon. He explained that although his family has lived in Karnataka for centuries, 15 generations back, they came from Tamil Nadu, so they celebrate the holidays from both states.

It wasn't until later when I shared that story with Elizabeth that she pointed out just how long 15 generations is. In the Bible, of course, a generation is 40 years long, so 15 generations would be 600 years. For us, I think it is more like 25 years, which is 375 years.

Elizabeth can trace her family roots back to the Mayflower and before that to Germany. My father's family has only been in the US for a few generations (I think I am 5th or so) and before that to Ireland. My mother's father (Crockett), traces back to pre-revolutionary times. My mother's mother's family, though, is Cherokee and Chocktaw. That means that 15 generations ago, my ancestors were born in roughly the same exact place that I was born in - in upstate South Carolina.

I admire Suresh and his family not only for knowing their family history so well, but for continuing to hold on to old traditions as a means to hold on to his ancestral roots. If anyone is out there reading, I hope you will write a comment and maybe even tell us where your family was 15 generations ago and what, if any, traditions you hold onto.

I leave you with this, my own small tribute to my ancestry, although a bit of an anachronistic one. Here is a recording of The Lord's Prayer in Cherokee:
http://www.cherokee.org/extras/Downloads/Language/mp3/lords_prayer.mp3

Monday, February 19, 2007

Emotional Response

This is a little embarrassing (and Elizabeth makes fun of me for it), but on three different occassions, as I was driving my motorcycle to school in the morning, I started to cry.

The first time, in fact, I almost had to pull over and stop driving. Just before I pulled over, though, I imagined the sight of a white man sitting on a motorcyle in the middle of a busy farmer's market in Bangalore crying... and that made me laugh... so I was able to keep going. What is interesting is that I have no way to explain what emotion I was having. I was not sad. I was not hurt. I was not happy. There isn't a word to describe the emotion. At the time, I was listening to the Democracy Now podcast on my iPod and they were playing a speech by Martin Luther King the night before he was killed (the famous and prophetic "I may not get there with you" speech). I became overwhelmed with a strange mixture of emotions... sadness, to be sure; awe; inspiration; urgency; frustration; anger; and even some joy, just to mention a few. My point is that language is simply inadequate to describe such emotions.

The second time, I was actually listening to a Norah Jones interview on the
NPR Shuffle podcast. She started telling the story of her time in the recording studio with Ray Charles when she was just 20 years old or something. For some reason, I started to cry again. What is interesting is that I was at exactly the same farmer's market as the last time (this was about a week later). Once again, I have no word to describe the emotion.

The third time, once again I was listening to an NPR podcast and driving through exactly the same farmer's market. This time it was a story about Barbaro, the racehorse who had just been euthanized. Again, I started to cry. The mixture of emotions this time certainly included sadness, but also frustration and many other emotions, which I may explore in another blog later. But my point here is that we, as human people, have so many countless emotions, and no real way to express those emotions in words. There is an ineffability to life; a mystery that we can never understand about what makes us who we are; what makes us vulnerable; what makes us, well, human.

So, for anyone out there who might read this blog, family or stranger, I invite you to respond (anonymously if you prefer), with descriptions of emotions that you might have experienced that we have no word to describe. In my last sermon in New Jersey, I shared a phrase by Rudolph Otto that happens to be my favorite and, I think, is fitting here. It is the Mysterium Tremendum... the Mystery of Experience which is at once tremendous and trembling... Terrible and Terrific. It is this mystery, I think, that makes us who we are.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

To My Valentine...

You are the light that wakes me in the morning
And the lullaby that caresses me to sleep at night.
You are the arms that keep me safe and warm
And the song that makes my heart dance.
To say I love you is to make light
Of the joy that you bring to my world.
Yet, nevertheless, these words
Are the best I can offer
In an attempt to explain
How you've changed my world.

I love you, my darling husband,
Elizabeth

Monday, February 12, 2007

Long Lapses

It's just hit me how neglectful Brad and I have been of this blog and you, our loyal readers. There are quite a few reasons for this, which I won't get into as it'll just perpetuate the habit. Suffice to say, I'm going to try and get back into the swing of things. We have a lot happening in the next few months. I've changed gears a bit and I'm studying from home for another degree. Ali, a friend of mine from the physics program at Drew, is coming to visit in March for a few weeks. Brad finishes his first year in March also and then has a few months off before beginning again in June. He has a lot on his plate during that time, but we're hoping to meet up with our friends Josh and Megan as they begin their own South East Asia adventure. We'll hopefully see them in April or May. Then in August, they'll be coming through India and we'll have more adventures then.

We're only 15 months away from being back in the US! It's amazing how fast time flies when you stop paying attention! Let the blogging (re)begin!

Monday, January 29, 2007

A Great Article

There is a wonderful article on BBCNews today regarding the effect of globalization in Bangalore. While Bangalore is growing at staggering rates, the development of the infrastructure isn't keeping pace. The article touches on that as well as just how big the IT boom is here. One thing to take note of is the shanty towns at all the building sites that they discuss. I'll try to take some pictures of what they mean. The people who build the fancy and expensive high rises can't afford rent here, so instead they live in tents made from tarps at the building sites. I see at least a dozen on my way to and from NCBS. It's really heartbreaking.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

A few more pics

OK, by a "few" I mean 392. All of them are from the diving portion of the trip and most of them are from under the water. However, most of them have labels and you can download the whole folder, if you have any interest in that. You can also view a slideshow of the pics.

OK, back to reading Aurobindo now... I am on page 672... only 428 pages left. :0

Monday, January 22, 2007

Superiority Complex

I’m sure it is obvious to many of you that I am Brad’s superior. Indeed, any interaction that you have with either of us will result in the quick conclusion that Brad became a fortunate man when he married the extraordinary girl that is, well, me. If there is a guru in the family, I am that guru with Brad as my indolent yet enthusiastic disciple.

If you fail to recognize the truth in this matter, you need look no further than the events that transpired recently. I went to Brad’s campus to meet him for lunch one day last week, at which point he handed me a letter, addressed to his Superior. (Exhibit A) Within the envelope was a letter that invited me to a celebration of all superiority at DVK, to take place this afternoon. In truth, the section of the letter regarding the intention of the entire community to honor and laud their superiors was in boldface font, clearly indicating that this was the ultimate desire of all involved. Please do take notice of the use of the phrase your reverence when referring to me in the first line of the third paragraph.

While I was not certain if I wanted to take advantage of this occasion, as I never am one to brag about my superiority, my feelings were swayed this very morning when Brad begged me to join him this afternoon. “Dear wife,” he proclaimed, “it would not be good of me to salute others when clearly you are the one who is most deserving of such an auspicious occasion.” Therefore, to please my husband’s need to exalt my very existence, we departed for the campus this afternoon.

When we got there, we were invited, by the Dean of the institution, to sit in a section for luminaries. We sat through a lovely series of speeches, songs and even some interpretive dance before gifts were bestowed upon each of the students' Superiors. While I did my best to remain modest and coy, I could not help but notice that there was thunderous applause when my name was proclaimed from the podium. Yes, the gentlemen and gentlewomen who attend classes there are clearly aware of how great I art. I gracefully ascended the platform and gathered a delightfully wrapped package into my hands.

The presentation of gifts went on for a few more minutes, after which we were given a small portion of light snack with a scrumptious serving of tea to accompany. The final remarks spoken, Brad and I mingled with the other guests, many of whom were quick to acknowledge how superior I am. Although one of Brad’s professors made the mistake of calling me his guardian, I quickly corrected his blunder, which he was gracious enough to admit.

When we arrived home, I opened my package to find a folio of the softest faux blue leather with the words “Philosophy Faculty Day” emblazoned across the cover. (Exhibit B) So if there is ever a doubt in this flat that we call a home regarding who should be praised, I will always have my gift to show Brad, demonstrating that the world at large concedes that I am, and forever will be, Brad’s Superior.


Exhibit A: A glorious invitation

Exhibit B: The gifted folio


Finally!

So, after much aggrevation and a lot of fighting with winkflash, the pics are LOADED! WHEEEE! There are a lot of them (I think over 300) so feel free to peruse as many as you like. There are shots from all aspects of the trip: wandering through Bangkok, wandering by coral underwater, wandering around the boat. Truly, that's all we did for two weeks: wander.

I've included 31 of our favorites here. However, if you click this handy link, you can be awed and inspired by the rest.

Brad and Elizabeth's Thai Adventure Pics

And now, a preview:

With all of our gear, we couldn't quite fit in the picture.

A leopard shark. People came so close to it,
as you can see from the pic Brad took.
A manta ray. There are no words. We'll try,
but it's beyond intelligible language to describe.

On our way back to land after two weeks on a boat. I got
land sickness that night.

The man who made the trip: John.
He was the dive captainof the boat.

On the surface in the water.

The best product description I've ever seen.

Brad riding the undersea subway.

Brad and a manta ray.

Batfish. They were each 2 - 3 ft. across. And shimmery.

A blue spotted sting ray. We had a close call with one that
made us think we were going to have our own Steve Irwin-esque moment.

The dome of the Golden Temple with a stand
where people hang bells with prayers on them.

A ghost pipefish. While they aren't rare, they are very hard to
find as they are ~2cm in length. We were fortunate to see this one twice.
The amateur photographer from the Netherlands was jealous!

The galley where we ate and hung out between dives.

Elizabeth hanging on while being towed back to the ship.

A christmas tree. If you get too close, they close up.
This is very close up. They are 3-4cm in length.

A humphead parrotfish. As John said, a fish so ugly
that even its mother couldn't love it.

A hermit crab. Isn't he cute?

A thornback boxfish. They are VERY rare in the
region where we're diving. Tomas was very
impressed that I found it.

I found Nemo!!

A Jenkins Whiptail Ray. He was going through the
"carwash" getting a bath. (And yes, At the Carwash was
running through my head while watching him.)

Pearl eyed moray eel. They are very rare.

A praying mantis shrimp. They are very shy and hard
to spot. This one kept moving his tail closer to me,
like was going to strike me with it.

One of many sunrises.

Tiny little fleurs. They were maybe 10mm wide.

This is what pure joy looks like.

A sea urchin. They were so cool. I love the orb in the middle.

Tiny crabs. This is Brad's favorite pic from the trip. There
are three in the picture and the largest was 2-3cm.

Fleurs and bells at the Golden Temple in Bangkok.
I rang one of the bells and it was terribly loud.

Little shrimps. Anyone hungry??

Squid! They are so cool! They float along and are irridescent.